11-Nov-2015 04:43

Internet dating greeting

It says “Hey, I might be sort of interested in you, but I’m going to let you do all the legwork.” Don’t give her a nudge and expect her to then message you, because she probably won’t.

A message that reads: “Hello, nice to “meet” you, I’m John. You might think it’s flattering, but in general women don’t like to be approached like that.So girls and guys must have drastically different experiences with online dating.The girls post a profile and get bombarded with messages from guys, guys scan profiles and message the girls.So, do you have any advice for how to get my message to stand out? Most dating sites have a flirty option which allows you to express your interest without having to actually message a person.(On How About We, this is the “I’m Intrigued” button, on OKCupid it’s a wink.) In general, this is not a good way for a guy to approach a girl on an online dating site.I’ve read your profile, and I think you sound nice…” …is way less engaging than this: “What!! Especially online, when women maybe a little more on-guard, opening with a comment on their physical appearance runs the risk of seeming shallow and off-putting.

Besides — if they really are that pretty they’re probably hearing that from every unoriginal guy on the site, and it Sometimes, misguided men will send out first messages that read like autobiographies.

“I studied architecture in college and studied abroad in Spain for a semester.

My perfect night in involves a bottle of wine and my Arrested Development DVDs. I’d love to go to Africa some day.” you), you’re already half-way there. Related: Online Dating 101: Sending a Second Message After you’ve composed your message, ask yourself what you would respond if you received this from someone.

I don’t smoke, but don’t mind if you do…Well, message me if you want to go out.” Messages like this are not only boring (if she wants to know about you she’ll either click on your profile or, even better, ask you), but they give no indication of why you want to go out with her. Try something like this instead: “Whoa, you studied abroad in Ghana? Once she laughs, she lets her guard-down a little, she thinks you’re funny, and probably smart. Did you ask her a question, did you set-up a joke she could build on?

Not that you have to turn into Seth Rogen all of the sudden, but in general, on the internet, humor is far less abrasive than, say, ardent fervor.

Your first message determines the initial impression you make, and only about one-third of first messages even receive a reply.

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